Luke, I Owned Your Father

Not since Luke Skywalker found out that Darth Vader was his father has there ever been such an incredibly crazy revelation of family lineage as today. Al Sharpton, the black man who ran for President in 2004 calling for racial equality, might be related to Strom Thurmond, the now deceased crusty old white man who ran for President in 1948 as a segregationist. Holy crap! According to the people at Ancestry.com Sharpton's great-grandfather Coleman Sharpton was a slave owned by Julia Thurmond, whose grandfather was Strom Thurmond's great-great-grandfather.
Nothing has been determined yet, but if this turns out to be true, this will be proof that God does indeed have a sense of humor. The only downside to this story is that it wasn't discovered three years ago before Thurmond passed on so that finding this out could have been what killed him. I look forward to the Oliver Stone version of this movie where that is what happens. Al Sharpton will be played by Samuel L. Jackson, and Strom Thurmond will be played by Peter O'Toole. The final line will be Samuel L. yelling, "Fillibuster!? I'll Fillibusta' cap in yo' motherf***in' ass!"

Debut Show?

The eagle eyed Nate and Nathan fan may have noticed on our website we have listed a show on our "shows" page. In fact, we have listed 8 shows, all on April 29th at 7pm at the Pyramid Brewery. We're not performing 8 shows at the same time in the same location, but we might be performing one show that night. That show would be our debut show. We're not exactly sure if we're going to perform that night or not. So don't get your panties in a bunch. But maybe we will. So keep an eye on the website for future updates.

Lazy?

Do you get tired of clicking all those links in order to get to our blog? Wouldn't it be nice if we would just come to you? Well, now we can! On the right side of our blog is a button that says "subscribe me!" Enter your e-mail into the space above it, click the button, and then you'll receive daily digests of our blog. Oh, man! Isn't technology sweet! High five!

Headlines and Punchlines

Here are some real headlines found online, and then some punchlines I thought of while waiting in line.

"Rats Seen Scurrying at KFC/Taco Bell" - Seems like anyone can get a job at a fast food restaurant these days.

"Thongs, Fishnets Called Harmful to Young Girls"- One young girl was split in half when a bully gave her an atomic wedgie.

"Line Between Overeating, Binge Disorder is a Thin One" - It's called the buffet line, and it's not all that thin.

"Police Probe Prostitute, Serial Killer's Link" - I just don't think the word probe should be used when talking about a prostitute.

"White House Disputes Iraq as 'Worst Mistake' " - Yeah, they've still got one more whole year.

"Twelve Steps to Curing E-mail Addiction" - Here's a story you should forward to all your friends.

"More Evidence For Water On Mars" - It won't be long before we have Mars bottled water.

site progress

The geniuses at Westie Design Lab are workin' hard on our site. It's coming along real nicely. Soon you'll be able to see pictures of our shows and promotional shots, videos, and all the information you'd ever need about our shows. It's still under construction, but come check it out anyway. We're adding new stuff everyday, and very soon we'll be fully operational. We'd love to hear your feedback. Click on the "join the mailing list" link on the top right of the pages, or simply send us an email at nateandnathan@gmail.com to let us know what you think. E-mailing us will also register you for our mailing list so that you can receive monthly updates on our progress and you'll be eligible to win free tickets to our shows!

How Many Licks?

I was thinking about the age old riddle, "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop." When you are a kid you don't really question things. You just say, "oh, yeah, that Owl is wise, he'll know the answer." But now I'm thinking that maybe he wasn't the best suited person/animal to answer that question. I mean, do owls even have tongues? Why didn't the kids ask someone who worked in the licking industry? I'm sure they could have found a prostitute walking around who would have been a much better judge of the situation. I mean, the owl cheated! He got impatient and bit the lollipop. Prostitutes know that you aren't supposed to bite the lollipop. I think Oliver Stone should re-make that cartoon commercial with a more realistic take on it.

The Awesomeness

We're currently having our real website, nateandnathan.com, worked on. We hired our good friends at the Westie Design Lab to do all of our marketing and promotional materials. The work they are doing is worth millions of dollars, but they are doing it for a very fair price (fair to us, not fair to them). If you want a website, or some cool posters designed, or maybe the perfect business cards, they are the guys to go to. So check them out.

On a scale...

This is the first blog entry I, Nathan, have ever done, so I'm going to begin my blogging career by rating Nate and Nathan on a couple of homemade scales.

On a scale from...

- 1 to 10, N&N is an 8. But it is a solid 8.
- 1 to Super Sweet, N&N is a 20. That is almost all the way to Super Sweet.
- 1 to Blow Your MIND Funny, N&N is "MIND Funny", as we haven't yet performed for "Your" and thus have limited actual "Blow"-ing references. But we got that "MIND Funny" going.
- Nate's bathroom, we are about 348.

I think that pretty much wraps it up for now. See you soon.

nateandnathan.com

We have officially acquired our website domain name, www.nateandnathan.com! If you click on that link it will take you to a really crummy page. But soon clicking on that link will be your ticket into a world of wonderment and glee. And awesome radicalness. We plan on having a really sweet site with all sorts of interactive elements. But we need your help. What kind of things should we have? Besides all the usual trappings of a comedians page, calendar, mailing list, photos, etc., what would you, the fan of comedy, like to see at our website? What will keep you coming back? No, not porn. What else? leave a comment with your suggestions.

Almost Famous

Okay, so we haven't exactly started performing our show yet. In fact Nate and Nathan, as a show, is still pretty much just a concept. But we have begun writing our show and are feeling pretty confident that we will be a huge success. And by huge success I mean we'll be able to get our parents to come to the show. In the meantime, we think it would be a good use of our time to think about what life will be like when we are huge mega-stars.

First of all, this blog will no longer be written by us. Instead it will be written by people who have been hired to mimic our writing style and grammatical prowess. So pay close attention over the next few years/months/weeks (however long it takes) to see if you can tell when there is a switch from us to our mimickers.

Another thing that will change is we will stop eating. That's right Nichole Ritchie, you aren't the only game in town!

Oh, also, we will no longer do live comedy shows. All our shows will be performed via satellite.

Quiz Post

This is a test post, but it is a really short test post so it's really just a quiz post. And since you didn't know it was coming, it is a pop quiz post. No cheating!